Israel apologizes for attack on UN post, says it forgot to reprogram American-made bombs

Israel has accepted full responsibility for its attack on a United Nations post in Southern Lebanon on tuesday, which resulted in its total destruction as well as the deaths of two four UN observers. This attack, carried out through smart bombs that were shipped to Israel by the US, dazzled the international community by its precision targetting of UN personnel while keeping Lebanese civilian casualties to a minimum. Israel has apologized to the international community, saying that it forgot to reprogram the targeting mechanism of these smart bombs, which, as they leave American assembly-lines, come preprogrammed to destroy UN bases throughout the world.

The United States, which is currently engaged in a perpetual state of warfare against the United Nations, has developed a huge arsenal of bombs to be utilized in attacks against that organization and its peacekeeping bases throughout the world. These bombs involve state of the art technology which allows them to determine the locations of UN personnel on the ground and target them for elimination with pinpoint accuracy.

The US has already added the United Nations to its list of "rogue terrorist organizations", and has accused it of being actively involved in aiding worldwide terrorism and insurgency by refusing to provide the US with a blank check for invading any country it pleases. The UN has also angered Americans by carrying out peacekeeping and humanitarian missions in countries attacked by the US or any of its allies, in this case, Israel.

Many American conservatives have advocated that in addition to eliminating United Nations terrorist camps throughout the world, the United States should not balk at destroying those that exist on its own soil, regardless of the American casualties that would result in the process. These counterterrorism experts justify these casualties by saying that "if by ignorance, complicity, neglect or helplessness the Americans wouldn't throw the UN out and establish a strong government, then they must pay the price for the sins of the UN". Although most agree that the appointment of John Bolton's moustache as American ambassador to the United Nations was a step in the right direction, more needs to be done towards bringing the UN to its knees in order to force it to toe the line of American foreign policy regardless of its ill-effects on the rest of the UN member nations.