Yesterday started out like a regular garden variety tuesday. The alarm rang at 5:45, I was walking to my car in my pajamas by 6:00 and 6:02 saw me and my wife in the car, waiting for the traffic lights to change at the intersection leading to the train station. The old familiar lead-in skit that signified the beginning of the morning radio show I listen to was playing. It goes like this:
Woman in a mexican accent : Housekeeping!
Sleepyman : Hmpgrgrglub....
Woman in a mexican accent : Housekeeping?
Sleepyman : nmblglm....10 more minutes.
Woman in a Mexican accent : You need towel?
Sleepyman : No towels....need sleepy
Woman in a mexican accent : You need pillow?
Sleepyman : Please go away, let me sleep for the LOVE OF GOD.
This is where the actual show begins. It's actually a pretty funny skit. Unless, of course, you are listening to it at 6:00 in the morning and your state of mind is pretty much similar to that of the sleepy man in the skit.
So, every morning, the location on my station route where this skit begins determines whether my wife is going to miss her train or not. If it begins at the traffic lights we were waiting at, chances are good that the train would probably leave without my wife on board. Naturally, I was impatient.
Soon, the lights turned green and I gunned my car and started to turn left. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a red sports car came speeding from the left, and just as it approached the intersection, instead of slowing down for the red light, it accelerated. I realized in disbelief that he was going to run the red light. I was already almost halfway up the intersection, and I saw this guy roaring towards me, and if I had not slammed on the brakes in reflex, he would have crashed right into my passenger's side of the car. He flew past barely a whisker away from my front bumper. He was doing about 80 mph or so, so my death would have been instantaneous.
I sat there for a while so fucking stunned, my hands shaking, that the lights turned orange and red, before I even managed to jab down on my horn. I sat there blaring my horn, even though the guy in the red car had already disappeared from my life. I don't know how long I sat there, till my brain came to grips with the fact that I had just met Death face to face. I was seething at this person who would be so careless with other people's lives, just so he could save a couple of seconds on his commute. God yeah, how I was seething.
Then, I began to think about how close both of us had been to death. If I had moved even half a second before I did, our bodies would probably be lying in a morgue right now. What had determined that I would live and not die? Was it not my time? Was it Divine Intervention?
And it was then that I came one step closer from being a skeptic to a full-blown atheist. If God really had some say in the matters of men, would he really have bothered to save me from Death? As I look at my life, it is quite clear to me that I have sinned a lot. As Homer Simpson said, heck, I don't even believe in Jebus. And I'm sure God wouldn't be too pleased with this blog either. Why, then, would God bother to save me?
Many people might say to me that au contraire, the very fact that your life was spared proves that there IS a God. I beg to disagree, my pious friend. Think about it for a moment. Do you really think I am so fucking arrogant to believe that my life is somehow special and that He should save me when God did not bother to save his own son, or these people who were actually pious and might have deserved to live more than I ever did?
If there were a God, then I should be dead right now. Since I am not, there cannot be a God. It is as simple as that.