President Bush showing signs of giving a flying fuck about presidency

Sources close to the president have revealed that all signs point to the fact that he might have begun to give a flying fuck about his duties as the leader of the free world. (via Raw Story).

Aides of the President have reported that Bush has lately seemed to be more than a little dark, angry, bitter and somewhat less inebriated with the power of his position. Analysts point out that this change in the president's mood could have a lot to do with things not going his way in Iraq, as well as fervent in-party opposition to the president's Supreme Court nominee.

This is the first time since he was elected in 2000 that the president has hinted that he might be on the verge of giving more than half a syphillitic rat's ass about the position of commander-in-chief that about 50% of America voted him into. During previous crises that have taken place during the president's tenure, such as Hurricane Katrina and the 9/11 terrorist attacks, he had always maintained a cool, calm detached persona more in tune with the lackadaisical attitude of a bystander observing a car crash not involving members of his immediate family. However, recent reports of his behavior indicate that the president's view of his executive responsibilities might have become a tad less frivolous than before.

Historically, American presidents have been observed to take their presidency seriously during the initial few years, followed by a period of indifference and lethargy, which might or might not lead to illicit sexual activity in the oval office in order to counter the effects of second term atrophy. However, experts say, this is the first time in the history of America where a president has begun to show, for the first time, more than a few turds worth of interest in the functioning of his government at the tail end of his presidency.

"I've got a job to do," the president told reporters last week. "The American people expect me to do my job, and I'm going to. And the first order of business will be to find out precisely what doing that job entails.", added the president with a determined look on his face.

In related news, markets were down due to the pall of apprehension cast by news that the president would be taking over his presidential responsibilities.