Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Why the Onion isn't just any vegetable

US blowjobless rate at all time high screams the headline.

The article goes on to say :

"In the wake of a recent drop in the sexual-interest rate, Labor Secretary Elaine Chao announced Tuesday that blowjoblessness in America has reached a record high."

Furthermore,

"The historically fluid blowjob market reached its climax in 1996, when millions of wives and girlfriends vigorously stimulated the privates sector."

And finally,

"'For many of these orally disenfranchised men, a hand-to-mouth existence is but a dream,' Cochran said."

And that is why my friends, you should bow to the mighty Onion.

5 comments:

GREATBONG said...

Bow to or blow to.....? :-)

gawker said...

Yes, that too, although blowing the onion might cause bad breath heh.

arzan said...

They could give a tough run to TOI if they competed in the same market !!

Abi said...

Thank the freaking *** they are not blaming outsourcing to India ... er ... for this debacle!

Onion ROCKS!

gawker said...

Arzan : heh

abi : Maybe they should be outsourced to India. I'm sure Indians could use some.